


Rewrite the Stars and Say My Name

by VirusZeref



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Black Canary (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Arab Character, Canon Compliant, Childhood Trauma, Coming of Age, Damian Wayne Feels, Damian Wayne Needs a Hug, Damian Wayne-centric, Damian is not Robin, Dick Grayson is a Talon, Fanfiction of Fanfiction, Former Talon Dick Grayson, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, LGBTQ Character, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mentor/Protégé, Mentor/Sidekick, Mother-Son Relationship, Other, Personal Growth, Rewrite, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2020-05-14 09:25:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19270417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VirusZeref/pseuds/VirusZeref
Summary: Ibn al Xu'ffaschGrandson of the DemonSon of Talia Al GhulDamian Al GhulDamian WayneIn one world, he joins his father and becomes Robin, all while battling the demons of his past by himself.In another world, he never suffers under the hands of Talia al Ghul and is graced with the presence of an Amazon and her family. He becomes their family.But this is not those worlds.In this world, Damian decides for himself what he wanted.He decides whether the path he was walking on with the one for him.It wasn't, but he had the backing of a mentor.A canary.He will rewrite the stars.And they will say his name.





	1. Do I Belong Here?

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Change of Fate](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11045232) by [VirusZeref](https://archiveofourown.org/users/VirusZeref/pseuds/VirusZeref). 



> PLEASE READ WHAT IS WRITTEN BELOW
> 
> Hello, everyone, this is Virus again!
> 
> So this was going to be a rewrite of my Siren!Damian fic, but I decided to change it completely. This is an alternative branch of the story. One that will be focusing on Dinah and Damian relationship as well as developing his persona of Siren. Before you read there are a few things you will need to know:
> 
> 1.) Yes, I will not be deleting any of the original fanfictions, but I will not be completing that one. That series is discontinued.
> 
> 2.) I will be posting on my Tumblr and on here, design of what Damian's new outfit will look like. If you have your own ideas, I would love to see them!
> 
> 3.) Yes, the world of Amazon!Damian and this one are connected. And yes, there will be a crossover event for those happening in the future.
> 
> 4.) Damian will gain his own big bad as well as his own team. He will not be joining the Teen Titans like in the original series. He does confront Kori'andr about her involvement in the Mirage situation, however. 
> 
> 5.) And Yes, DamiJon WILL happen but it will be a LONG time before that happens. As well as him meeting Jon in the first place.
> 
> If you have any questions or headcanons you want to share, please leave them in the comments or hit me up on Tumblr.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this first chapter.

Going behind his father’s back was almost child’s play. 

 

Damian crossed the Gotham river with effortless ease, however, this was still nothing compared to the training he endured under the reign of his mother. Ten years, ten long and fruitful years had led to this moment. The moment that he had been waiting for since he could talk. 

 

Of course, he was trained to wield a sword before learning to speak anyway. 

 

Ten years of fantasising about finally able to meet his father, just like the mother had promised him. An Al Ghul always keeps their promises. Only when the fruits of labour benefited them but he was his mother’s child, her pride and joy. She could never say no to him, his wishes and requests. It was primarily that reason he had Goliath in the first place, a prisoner of war from the Year of Blood. A year that Damian wears with pride in his accomplishments.

 

For now.

 

No more beating his mother during a spar only to be ransacked in the end, with a swift reminder that he should be prepared to deal the final blow to his opponent. No more birthday challenges; if Damian was being honest, he had grown tired of those. One can only face defeat after defeat before it starts to wear off on someone. Something that was beaten out of him but alas it stayed. 

 

He was only a child after all.

 

A child of a demon and his daughter.

 

Meeting his father for the first time, sword pressed against the soft skin of his cheek, threatening to slice it away…

 

It was an uneventful affair. 

 

He’d thought his father be happy, exlibreilated even. He had a biological son cleansed of the flaws and failures of the human body. Better than the imbeciles that he had taken under his wing, compared them Damian was flawless.

 

He was perfect. 

 

Instead, his father looked at him with pity in his features, the frown on his face twitching. Damian was furious, almost demanding for his father’s head to be on a silver platter. How dare he have that look on his face. He should be glad, happy even. He was the union between the Al Ghuls and the Wayne.

 

He was Damian Al Ghul, and he was enraged.

 

He was quickly taken to Wayne Manor, it was….smaller than he expected. He expected the other Robins to be bowing to him, happy that he was here. All he got was unwanted touching from Grayson, and gazing of disdain from Drake. The one that his grandfather happily called “The Detective”.

 

Drake didn’t deserve the title. He didn’t even deserve the title of Robin, it was rightfully Damian by birthright. He was born to be a weapon, compared to Drake, who only came into this world with an obsession with the Dynamic Duo. Pleading to his father that he needed a Robin after Jason’s death. 

 

Speaking of Todd.

 

The moment he met Todd, their eyes glanced at each other but there was no recognition. No memory of how he had babysat Damian and told him stories about his father. No recall about the game that they had with each other. It started out innocently, Jason would take his blanket and Damian would steal a pen from his desk or something small and unimportant. However, things changed, and they started taking something they considered special or important to them. 

 

They both knew that they would return it later but for the moment, whatever they had was their prize. 

 

Todd still didn’t get his original Robin symbol back, Damian still had it. Kept it close and hidden away from everyone, including his mother when Jason had left. Gained from winning a spar with the other boy, and Damian had been in awe. In his hands was the very symbol of Robin, the one that he was destined to have. 

 

When he announced that, his father shut him down immediately. Telling him that he wasn’t ready to take the mantle. Neither was Dick, or Todd, or  _ Drake _ . He was hidden away after, hidden from Gotham’s prying eyes. The excuse was that he wasn’t used to big cities, which was a lie. Damian had ventured into large cities before, he had visited Dubai with his mother before. Sure they ended up slaughtering some higher officials but he visited it. 

 

It counted.

 

His father claimed that he wasn’t a people-person and he needed to learn. Expand his horizons.

 

Pathetic.

 

Pathetic excuse.

 

He should have just failed his birthday challenge on purpose if this is what he was going to get. He had been in Gotham, in his father’s household for about a month and he hated it. No one was fair to him, no one wanted to listen to him. Either Drake had fifty reasons why he shouldn’t be trusted or Grayson would give fifty reasons why he should relax and take it easy. Despicable.

 

Pathetic.

 

He still was not allowed to leave the Wayne Manor grounds but that wasn’t going to stop him now, was it?

 

The river was cold but he had swum and fought in colder temperatures. Damian took a moment to breathe in the air. The musky air from all the factories and smog produced in this city. He has gotten used to the smell of sulfur and the air but he still feels the urge to vomit. Gotham wasn’t clean, and that was a pity. 

 

She was a beautiful city. 

 

He walked down a short path before mindlessly wandering around. Gotham was alive during the nights, always busy with people bustling about, going to their late night jobs or going home to their families. Damian ignored the weird feeling in his chest at the mere thought of it, sneering. Those people were simple-minded, obediently blind to all the rules and limitations that they gave themselves. His grandfather was correct of course, he was rarely wrong about anything; human beings were like sheep. They enjoy being controlled by someone who has the strength, knowledge and power to do so.

 

_ “And you, my grandson, will rule among them all. Like a god.” _

 

Damian believed this to be true, and he still believed it, regardless of Drake’s sneers and loud statements that his grandfather was just a mad-man. Ra’s al Ghul has been around for centuries, he knows what he is talking about. He was the grandson of the ruler of Demons and he was going to rule. 

 

But he will not forget, he is a tool. 

 

A weapon, forged with care. His edges were sharp and he will slaughter those in his way. 

 

And Damian was proud of them. 

 

He was the best after all. 

 

He delightfully hummed, making his way through a park. It was one of the smaller ones that he has seen and didn’t have any playground equipment but it was doable. Surrounded by a small garden of flowers with plants native to Gotham. Though how any plant survives in this city was beyond Damian’s knowledge. Nor he did care much about it, in a few years, this city will under his Grandfather’s control, it will be his kingdom to rule. 

 

As promised to him.

 

And he will have it.

 

Still, he still couldn’t get anywhere without being told where to move or how to sit. Or how to eat. It wasn’t his fault that Pennyworth’s food is too rich, too buttery for Damian’s platatee. He was the equivalent of a prince, his grandfather had made sure that he barely consumed anything that wasn’t up to standards. Damian rubbed at his head and sat down on the grass, face pinching into a frown.

 

He had been in Gotham for only a little while and he hated it here.

 

Damian sat there for a while with his thoughts, eyeing the small creatures roaming around in the grass. In their element, their territory. 

 

Somewhat.  

 

He almost didn’t notice a woman approaching the park. He did, however, hear her, singing to herself. Damian looked up, eyes narrowed at the woman. She wasn’t much, just on the short side with blonde hair, dressed almost entirely in leather. Leather jacket, leather pants and leather combat boots. The only thing that wasn’t leather was the blue crop top she wore. Damian would have almost written her off as harmless, not even worth his time, if he hadn’t looked closely at her face, went she came closer. 

 

A scar across the bridge of her nose and two on the left side of her face. Clearly, she wasn’t a mere civilian if she was walking around like that, but he didn’t know if she was one of his father’s many allies or another villain in Gotham. If she was, well he could easily take her down. 

 

“What do we have here?”

 

How...did she sneaks up on him like that?

 

Damian moved back and rose to glare up at her, “Clearly you don’t know the meaning of personal space.”

 

The woman shrugged, “But I’m not a child, wandering around Gotham at night am I?” She appeared to look him over before speaking again. “And judging by the look of you, clearly you can take care of yourself.”

 

He tilted his head at her reply but didn’t have a chance to ask who she was, as she gave him a coy smile and walked away. Not that it mattered, he needed to return to the Manor before his father decided to burst a blood vessel. 

 

Damian doubts he will see this woman again. 

 

+++

 

He sees her again, but not as Damian but as Robin. Finally, the Robin mantle was his, as it should be. For the sake of his father’s unnecessary no-kill rule, he swallows down the urge to slit the throats of criminals where they stand. Clearly vernim of the world. 

 

He also swallows down the confusion and underlining thought that he was doing something wrong by taking the Robin mantle. Though why should he be ashamed or doing something wrong? He was born to take the mantle. 

 

That was that.

 

He could not rely on his thoughts or linger on them for any longer. 

 

She goes by Black Canary. 

 

Father has decided that he should be introduced to the Justice League, not out of common courtesy but as a secondary measure if he steps out of line anywhere else. The League takes him down. Simple as that, though it would be difficult because they see him as a kid. 

 

A mere child.

 

Though base on Wonder Woman’s thoughts on the matter, apparently his father has a habit of collecting orphans at young ages and dropping them into the world of terror. 

 

Damian growled low in his throat as his father spoke in his behalf. Why should he? Damian has a voice, he could speak for himself. Or did Father view him like the others? One word from him and he was suddenly a docile pet, a doll that could be shaped. 

 

He banished the thought in his mind, telling him that  _ isn’t that the same thing Ra’s al Ghul and Talia did to him _ .

 

If Black Canary recognised him underneath the mask, she didn’t comment on it. Personally, Damian has to wonder how she could fight crime or anyone in the way she was dressed, but he believed that was just a common theme surrounding the world of heroes and villains. One of the villains in Gotham was a clown for fuck sake. 

 

He really shouldn’t be surprised at this point, even though it has only been about an entire year he left the comforts of home for Gotham. 

 

“You have a no-kill rule, yet the child carries a sword?” Wonder Woman points out, her eyes focused on Damian’s person. He willed himself not to grasp onto his sword, though he was itching to draw it out and challenge her. He was interested in Amazon’s abilities but she does bring up a point. 

 

Black Canary cuts his father off by speaking, “How do we know he is capable-”

 

“A spar.”

 

Everyone’s eyes are on him now. Perfect. Damian tilted his head, ignoring his father’s pointed glare. He was tired of having someone speak at his behalf, it was truly the one thing he couldn’t stand being in the League of Assassins. He smiled, showing teeth. 

 

“Spar with me and I’ll show you what I can do Canary.”

 

At the sound of his voice, recognition sparked in the woman’s eyes and she grinned, “Follow me little bird.”

 

Before he could even take a step, his father gripped his shoulder tightly and pulled him away in a corner.

 

“What are you doing?” It sounded less of a question and more of a statement. And they both knew it. Damian looked at the hand gripping his shoulder before looking at his father with a deadly calm.

 

“If you are worried about me going too far, you clearly don’t bother to learn anything about me, Father.” He didn’t bother to be kind about the way he forces the man’s grip off him. It reminded him of how Mother would drag him around, during punishments if he failed. 

 

No.

 

Don’t think about that.

 

She did it all out of love for him. It was the reason for his existence. Damian marched forward with his head held high. 

 

Focus on the spar, banish any and all unwanted thoughts. Focus on the opponent, the enemy. 

 

Yes, he could focus on Canary.

 

He should focus on her. 

 

That’s all that mattered.

 

The training room was fashioned in the likeness of a dojo, which left him confused. He could have sworn that it was different when he was given a tour of the Watchtower. And they didn’t walk that much of a distance away.

 

“Each League member has a preference for the environment they prefer to train in a little bird. Using some of Supes’ Kryptonian technology of course.”

 

Damian nodded, saying nothing as proceeded to remove the sword at his side. 

 

“Actually, keep it on.” 

 

Damian whipped his head in her general direction, eyes widening behind the mask in shock, “Pardon?”

 

“Dinah.”

 

Damian watched as the woman- _ Dinah  _ slaughtered up to his father. It was almost comical that he had to look down at her due to her height. He rose an eyebrow as she pressed a nail in his armour, square in the middle of his chest.

 

“What I decide is none of your concern. If he has a sword and a hood I’m assuming that he can use it proficiently and it's not for decoration.”

 

She knew her stuff apparently, she was smarter than she let one. One glance at Damian and his father moved to stand next to Superman, with the Kryptonian looked on, concerned.

 

Probably at Dinah.

 

She walked back onto the mat with a smile on his face, “Let us begin, shall we? Impress me.” Damian gained a smile of his own and drew his sword. 

 

“I could say the same to you.”

 

No one moved, and it went completely silent as soon as Damian had spoken. His senses were heightened in the silence, and seemingly no one dared to breathe. Blood roared in his ears and his eyes narrowing at his target. 

 

A twitch of her hand.

 

A few strands of blond hair fell onto her face.

 

He moved first disregarding his sword and stabbing it into the ground. He had a plan and he was going to win. He could see her take on a familiar stance as he rushed towards her. Possibly going for his legs. He fake a kick to her middle before vaulting off the ground, using her shoulders to flip behind her to strike.  

 

Damian had truly forgotten the thrill of sparring with another human being. The training dummies in the Batcave do not count. But being there did provide him with insight on how the others fight, particularly Grayson. 

 

So ever the acrobatic.

 

It was perfect for this moment, he was mostly playing keep away with Dinah, waiting for an opening to strike.

 

She turned her body to fend off a flying kill at her head. Her legs were vulnerable. 

 

Now.

 

Damian landed on his hands and knees with the gracefulness of a cat and turned to kick at her legs to trip her. 

 

She fell for it, falling backwards only use her hand flip back onto her feet. The last time he used that move, his mother had scowled at him and for a fleeting moment, his heart nearly stopped at the rage in her eyes. He had wanted apologise. 

 

Dinah grinned wickedly, “Nice movement little bird.”

 

He clicked his tongue, “I’m just getting started, Canary.”

 

He truly was, the real combat was just beginning as they rushed at each other exchanging blows. Dinah was pushing him back but that was okay. She was leading him towards where he wanted to go. He blocked a strike from his left and grumbled at his right, grinning when feeling the hilt of his sword. 

 

Perfect. 

 

He ignored the cries of alarm from the sidelines and swung, feigning surprise when she blocked it with her arm. It was a cheap shot so anyone with half a brain would have noticed that. 

 

Though he didn’t expect her to slam her palm into the side of his head, knocking him off his feet. He grunted as he hit the ground hard, grumbling as Dinah held his sword in her hand, the tip of the blade at his throat.

 

“Yield.”

 

_ “One doesn’t yield unless they are dead,” Mother said to him, looking down at him with disdain and disappointment in her eyes. Damian nodded, eyes on the ground, bruised and bleeding from his side.  _

 

_ “Do you understand.” _

 

_ “Yes.” _

 

_ Damian flinched from her gaze and hurriedly corrected himself, “Yes, mother.” _

 

_ “Everything I do, I do out of love.” _

 

+++

 

Dinah was concerned. The kid wasn’t moving at all, staring at her. 

 

No, more like staring past her. To something or someone past her body. She knelt down unsure but her instincts were practically screaming that something was wrong. 

 

Very wrong. 

 

“Little bird?” she said quietly, reaching out to touch him. He slapped her hand away, glaring at her with such fury behind his mask. Dinah glanced to the others and raised her hand to stop them. 

 

They meant well but she could defend herself. And at the moment, Damian has hardly concerned her safety. He looked shell-shocked, unmoving like the young new heroes on their real mission. Not a virtual reality, but the real world where villains fight to kill. Bruce hadn’t said a word about the current Robin’s background but Dinah was smart enough to realise that this boy was trained. Trained very well in fact.

 

Too well.

 

She almost staggered back from him, slammed full force by the sudden realisation of it. The boy was trained and to be that skilled they have to be trained young. 

 

Very young.

 

Almost at the point where they stepped out of the womb.

 

This boy was a  _ child _ .

 

Bruce always had sidekicks that were young in age, starting from Dick who became Robin at the ripe age of 12. Jason followed later at the age of 14 and Tim was 13. 

 

But this kid. To this skilled at that age, someone trained him and broke him. 

 

No, they didn’t break him. She could see a fire raging within him, it was small but it was there. 

 

“Where did you learn to move like that,” Dinah said slowly, forcing herself not to look concerned. This Robin wouldn’t appreciate it despite the glowing need to mother him. Odd, she was never that way to any of the Robins.

 

No, rephrase that statement. She never felt that much maternal instinct towards one child that she just met twice. 

 

Not after Sin’s death. 

 

The boy said nothing at first, only stood and walked from her to collect his sword from her hand. 

 

“My mother and grandfather.”

 

It was low and quiet, but it was only for her ears only. Dinah threw a steel glare at Clark, daring him to say anything. Daring him to press the issue as he always does. 

 

The Kryptonian said nothing. 

 

Good.

 

“I look forward to our next sparring session.” 

 

The twitch of the corner of Robin’s mouth was enough.

 

+++

 

He snuck out again, and he still couldn’t feel bad about it. He was grounded from duty and patrol until further notice anyway so getting out of the mansion was a relief. Father didn’t say a word about his actions the day before but Drake decided that he needed his input on the matter. Calling him reckless and stubborn for using that type of stunt. 

 

_ "I don't remember asking for your opinion Drake. Damian sneered and spat near Drake’s feet before marching up the stairs to his room. He was too tired to bother to deal with Drake’s nagging and whining. Just a constant reminder that he didn’t belong there. _

 

_ He'd never belong.  _

 

And here he is now. 

 

With Alfred the cat of course.

 

A cat that his father felt inclined to give him as a gift. As if material things could stop Damian from just forgoing all that he has been taught just for his father’s no-kill rule. So far, he has been doing well. 

 

The sketchbook pages were merely a way to vent. 

 

Then again, he’s not complaining about Alfred the cat. The feline leapt onto his shoulder the moment he climbed down his bedroom window. Father and the rest were on patrol.

 

He won’t be missed for a good few hours. 

 

Damian ignored the brief ache in his chest at the mere thought of no one caring that he left. 

 

Why should he care?

 

Why did it matter so much?

 

More importantly, he had found a shortcut to the park. Which was excellent, he didn’t mind getting wet but he wouldn’t want Alfred to get wet. 

 

Dinah was before him this time, gardening tools and dirt surrounding her figure with potted plants. Judging by the buds, they were flowers. She didn’t appear to notice him until he spoke up.

 

“You could have outed me, but you didn’t.”

 

“Why would I do that?”

 

Damian scowled, ignoring Alfred’s tail flickering at the side of his face, “If I were you, I wouldn’t have hesitated to take that chance.” He watched as she hummed low in her throat before speaking again.

 

“Well, people can surprise you, little bird. Care to join me?”

 

He took the shovel after a few moments of looking at it. They worked mostly in silence, with Dinah humming beside him and Alfred nestled at his side.

 

“Little bird-”

 

“My name is Damian.” 

 

He was surprised by the lack of malice in his voice when he corrected her. 

 

It scared him.

 

Dinah smiled warmly at him, “Well then, Damian, how did you meet Bruce?”

 

“Are you two close?" Damian asked, patting the dirt flat underneath his palms. Throwing a little bit of dirt at Alfred, who glared up at him from his little corner.

 

Dinah laughed and Damian decided like he liked her laugh." Oh, little bird. We went to the same high school, I have  _ stories  _ about teenage Bruce Wayne. Just as brooding then as now."

 

Interesting. “He is my father.”

 

“Mother?”

 

He swallowed and looked at the sky, glaring at the lack of stars, due to the pollution in the air. 

 

Disgusting. 

 

Truly.

 

“My mother is Talia al Ghul.”

 

Dinah said nothing as she tilted her head to the sky as well. "I trained under your grandfather once upon a time. Though I doubt he even remembers." 

 

Damian shifted, "Grandfather has no use for people who impress him. He'd remember you if you have crossed him." He wrinkled his nose at Alfred flicking his tail in his face. Dinah snickered beside him, reaching out slowly to scratch behind his ears. Alfred the cat purred, sauntering over to her and rubbing against her stomach. 

 

Damian watched Dinah pick up Alfred up in her arms. "He seems to like you. Odd, he only accepts being touched only by me."

 

"I have a way with animals," she countered, letting Alfred mess with the strands of her hair as she gestured to the freshly planted garden. "Just as you have a knack with plants." Damian clicked his tongue but didn't disagree. They both sat there in silence once more, looking up at the sky. 

 

"You can see more stars in the desert," Damian said turning his face towards Dinah. She looked back at him and nodded. 

 

"Indeed, it's peaceful there."

 

Peace. 

 

Damian has never truly known peace. But that was something he kept to himself.

 

+++

 

It was three months later when Dinah saw Damian after that night. She was scolding Ollie for getting beaten up again and questioning her love for the man when Bruce stalked into the infirmary with Damian in toll. Only the boy looked almost furious. 

 

Oh boy, what happened? 

 

She knew better than to ask, instead opting for asking Damian for another spar. He agreed and they both left, ignoring Ollie's protest. He was a grown man, he could handle himself. 

 

It was only a couple of minutes when she halted for him to stop. "Your mind is not in it." The boy threw a flowering glare and rushed at her fists flying. Dinah sighed and caught them with her hands,

 

"Little bird."

 

That's all she apparently needed to say, Damian seemed to deflate almost instantly. She let him go and took a step back, assessing the situation. Something was bothering him and pressing him about it will cause him to stick down. 

 

"Robin."

 

She turned to see Bruce was back again, arms crossed as he waited for Damian to follow. An idea clicked in her head and she turned on her heel with a sweet smile on her face. 

 

"Batsy."

 

"Canary."

 

She tilted her head, "Can Robin visit me tomorrow in civilian clothing? I would like his opinion on a project I have been developing." The Dark Knight's eyes narrowed at her from under the cowl and she braced herself for playing twenty questions. 

 

"...We'll see you at noon tomorrow."

 

Score!

 

Dinah waved goodbye and proceed to use a zeta tube to transport herself home. Home being in Starlight City for the moment. In one of Oliver's apartment complexes that he owns but never checks on. She opened the door and clicked on the lights, removing her com and her boots in the process. Dinah proceeded to collapse on the couch, moaning in delight. That felt nice. 

 

But she couldn't rest just yet. 

 

A quick shower and a cup of Joe in her hand, she was back on the couch with a notepad and a pen at her side. Dinah leaned against the cushions and took a long sip before setting it down. She wasn't just a crime-fighting badass but she was also everyone's therapist. So, therefore, she needed to assess this as if she was having a new patient. 

 

She grabbed the pad and pen and began to write her thoughts. Looking back at any and all interactions with Damian. They were few and most of the time, she and he didn't mean to meet but they did and made the best out of it. They  _ mean _ t something despite how small they were. 

 

Dinah paused, massing her cramped hand, looking at her writing. Ugh, her handwriting was still as sloppy as ever. According to her notes, Damian is spoiled, brash and arrogant. But there were reasons for that. After all, she couldn't fault him for any of this, he was only ten years old. Or at least she believes he is ten. 

 

Okay...she had something to work with. He would only open up  _ if _ he believes he has trusted you. And Dinah wanted him to trust her. 

 

Maybe tomorrow will yield something. 

 

As for now. 

 

Sleep. 


	2. You are Good

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Why was he so nervous? He was just meeting Black Canary for the rest of the day in civilian clothing, acting like a normal child. Well, as normal as Damian could get. Damian glared at his reflection in a nearby mirror and opted to turn on his side, staring at the wall. 

 

He was fine. 

 

This was fine.

 

Then, why was he so nervous about this?

 

Damian agrees with his Grandfather on little but he agrees with him on this subject: Emotions are messy and complicated. It's in his best interest not to fall victim to them. Plus, he had reviewed Dinah’s files several times so there was nothing to worry about it. All of her interests and the places she constantly goes to were listed there. However, there was no indication that Dinah was taking him to any of her normal hunting grounds. A knock on his door startled him and he jumped before grumbled that the person could come in. 

 

Drake and Grayson. Grayson he could tolerate but Drake…

 

He hates Drake. 

 

Damian crossed his arms and focused his glare on the younger man, “What do you want Drake?” he hissed out. Nevermind that Alfred the cat was happily perched on his shoulders without a care in the world. Lucky cat. 

 

Grayson cut Drake off before he could make a remark, Damian could always tell. Drake’s mouth would twist into a scowl before speaking. 

 

“Anyways, how are you little D?”

 

Damian scoffed, “Must you call me by that nefarious nickname, Grayson?”  

 

Drake chuckled, his smile to Damian looked cruel, “Well that’s not the only names we can call you-”

 

“Get out of my room, Drake. Take you and your comment out and shove it!”

 

“Little D-”

 

Damian snarled, his eyes wild, “Both of you...GET OUT!” They both left, the door being closed too harshly to be normal. Thank you,  _ Drake _ . Damian hated nicknames, they remind him too much of his mother and the nicknames she gave him. Though they were not nicknames but insults disguised as nicknames. Beloved was her favourite, whether she was referring to him or his father. It had depended on her tone of voice. 

 

She...scared him.

 

_ Dinah calls you little bird constantly and you never have snapped at her. Why? Hypocrite. _

 

That was true, he had merely glared at her but had let her continue to call him that. Verus Grayson, who he has snapped at multiple times to stop. 

 

Why was she different that people he had been living with for almost a year.

 

This was confusing. 

 

Damian resolved to just lay on his bed, curling up with Alfred in an effort to calm his nerves. He didn’t feel sorry for snapping at Drake however, the damn bastard deserves it. Every day he made his life a living hell, any mistake or insult was met with Drake’s judgement. A judgement that his father uses against him. He hated Drake and Drake fully knew that. 

 

He hated him. 

 

Why couldn’t Drake respect him? Todd did. Damian liked Jason Todd, the Robin that was used as a warning and a horror story to him. Little did anyone in the family knew, he had known Todd before he came to Gotham. As a small child, the former Robin was the only form of joy he had. He doesn’t blame him for not keeping his promise. 

 

_ “Once I get back to Gotham, I’m coming back to get you.” _

 

_ Damian scoffed, his bottom lip forming a small pout, “Don’t keep promises you can’t keep Todd.” The older boy huffed with a warm smile on his face, bringing the small child into his arms, his face buried in Damian’s hair.  _

 

_ “Goodbye Todd.” _

 

_ “Bye, Damian.” _

 

Todd never did come back and Damian soon forgot about him, choosing to focus on his studies and challenges instead of the hole left in his heart.

 

Thank the gods that they were inside Damian’s room at that time and not in the hallway. Regardless of his status as the grandson of the Demon, showing any hint of a positive emotion could result in something happening to Jason. 

 

Punishment for him.

 

They wouldn’t dare to hurt Damian, laying a single finger on his skin. 

 

But anyone or anything he showed affection for…

 

They were targets.

 

Damian swore he learned his lesson after the death of his caretaker. The sight of her blood dripping down the sword and the cold, steel smile of his mother standing there next to her body, the smug sneer she had given her will forever haunt him. His mother said that it was necessary at the time but Damian even then had his doubts. 

 

A’isha’s sad smile and her eyes of forgiveness still haunt him. The look of resignation she gave him as Talia placed her sword, unsheathed in his hands, the point of the blade resting on her chest. Damian could remember the exact words that she had spoken to him. 

 

_ “You are good.” _

 

Good?

 

Damian scoffed, his fingers laced between Alfred the cat’s fur. He wasn’t  _ good _ , he has done things. Horrible things, yet his caretaker at the point of her death thought that he was good. Thought that he had good in him. 

 

Maybe grandfather was right, people can and will say anything before they die.

 

At least it had been quick.

 

Damian looked at the clock in his room, the constant ticking was grating at his ears and yet, provided a sense of comfort and tranquillity. Five minutes until Dinah arrived, he might as well wait by the door for her. He stretched, feeling the bones pop in his body before leaping off his bed with grace, Alfred trailing after him as he opened the door. Damian snorted with disbelief as the cat walked out of his room, head held high as well as the tail, nothing at all like Pennyworth. 

 

More like him.

 

Huh.

 

Grayson was in the kitchen, chatting with Pennyworth while sitting on the counter. The butler says nothing as the former Robin swiped a cookie and waved a cheerful farewell to the older men before walking over to him.

 

Oh, joy.

 

Grayson said nothing to him but simply hand half of the cookie to him. Damian’s nose wrinkled but he took the treat anyway. It was best that he get used to the extreme sweetness of American sweets, though Pennyworth’s shortbread cookies make up for the rolling of his stomach. It was somewhat worth it.

 

“Nervous?”

 

Damian scoffed and swallowed the cookie, holding back a gag. Gods that was too sweet. “Why would I be nervous Grayson? Don’t mistake your emotions for mine.”

 

“Emotions? Huh, never thought you had any.” 

 

Drake. 

 

Damian didn’t give him the satisfaction of retorting back but he did trip the other on their way out of the kitchen. Watching Drake let out a girl-like screech and fall on his face was thrilling, to say the least. One of the few good things that happened today. He shrugged off the disappointing stare Grayson gave him and casually stepped over Drake just as the door rang. 

 

Serves him right.

 

Now, let the main event begin.

 

+++

 

Dinah was starting to believe that this was going to be an interesting day the moment she stepped off her motorcycle in front of the Wayne Manor. Thank the gods that the press wasn’t on her tail as she entered the gated entrance just five hundred feet away. But someone will have a cellphone camera picture of the former rockstar Di entering Wayne Manor that will make its way on the internet. 

 

Bruce can handle that situation, she rather not touch it at all. She looked down her outfit, before shrugging it off. She was fine with the way she looked. For once Dinah wasn’t wearing her iconic leather jacket or one of the many leather jackets she owned. Today was a warm day, an unusual thing for Gotham so Dinah chose her outfit carefully. She looked more like an urban gardener than anything else, dressed in a simple white blouse and light blue denim jean shorts with converses. 

 

And let's not forget the large sun hat she wore. She looked out of place in Gotham with that thing on. 

 

She wasn’t surprised the moment she stepped in front of the door, it opened. Damian stood there, arms crossed with cookie crumbs on the side of his mouth. Dinah suppressed a small chuckle and just gestured to the side of her mouth. “You have a few crumbs, little bird.” Damian furrowed his eyebrows and took a step to the side, letting her inside. It didn’t take her long to be tackled by a furry friend.

 

Huh.

 

Since when Bruce got a dog?

 

The dog barked happily as it circled her being before running over to Damian and proceeded to lick his face. Judging by the kid’s look a disdain, he wasn’t that fond of the dog. Huh, maybe Damian is more of a cat person. 

 

“I have a cow in the Batcave, Dinah.”

 

Nevermind then.

 

Dinah leaned on her heels watching Damian grab a Zeta-tube mini teleporter. Where they were going, it was required. She planned for her and Damian to avoid Gotham for the entire day. Almost instantly, they appeared in an alleyway, that for once wasn't littered with trash or graffiti. 

 

_ Hello Coast City.  _

 

Coast City was Hal's domain, and surely he wouldn't mind if they happened to be there. He was off-world anyways. Dinah made sure to pick an event that they both could enjoy, and Damian didn't feel defensive. Based on her limited observations of him, she could tell that he didn't like crowds. Something that they both unknowingly relate to. 

 

Sure being a Rockstar meant one has to deal with large crowds and fans swarming her and her band after concerts, but that didn't mean she had to like it. Damian sniffed loudly and adjusted his jacket. 

 

"It's sunny."

 

Dinah bit down a laugh and instead let out a chuckle, "I assume you have not been on the other side of the country." She briefly gestured to the exit of the alley. "This is Coast City. Home of Green Lantern."

 

His eyebrows rose, "Jordan? Hm, I suppose he's off-world."

 

"Yep," she said with a small smile popping the 'p'. "But he wouldn't mind. Follow me with if you will."

 They walked out of the alley and easily blending in with the crowd. It was a small crowd, nothing suffocating. And with her hair in a messy bun and sunglasses to block out the sun, no one would recognise her. Dinah watched Damian with the corner of her eyes as he walked next to her. He eyed the booths as they passed. He either appeared nonchalant or interested, she couldn't tell. 

 

"What is this festival?" 

 

"Well, Coast City had a books festival and flower festival at separate times but recently they decided to combine them."

 

Damian shoved his hands in his pockets, "I don't see the point…but whatever suits them, I guess."

 

Dinah tilted her head, curious by his words, "You haven't explored the country besides Gotham?" 

 

"My father wants me to be homeschooled, and he didn't want to risk the media seeing me. His words, not mine." Dinah simply gestured to the booths, "I don't mean to pry but perhaps you explore these and see what you like. You don't  _ always _ have to please."

 

Judging by the way his eyes widened then narrowed and his mouth pressed into a thin line, Dinah knew she hit a sore spot. But what shocked her was when he only shrugged and walked away from her. 

 

Okay so maybe it wasn't  _ that  _ much of a sore spot. But damn, it was hard to talk to him. Dinah didn't know what topics were off-limits or lines that could be crossed. She sighed and kicked at the gravel. 

 

Anyways, where was that book of plants she spotted seconds before? 

 

+++

 

_ "You don't always have to please." _

 

"What did she know?" Damian muttered to himself, regardless of the fact that he agreed with her. He was always pleasing others whether it be his grandfather, mother or father. He could hear their voices in his head constantly, telling him to do one thing or the other. But Dinah's words were incorrect… 

 

Right? 

 

None of the booths were interesting him so far, he didn't even know why he decided to go anyways. Damian would have rathered just stayed home at this once. He leaned against a light pole, simply watching people go back. Without care, probably knowing that heroes were there to protect them. 

 

He wondered what that was like. 

 

Something wet and cold grazed his ear and Damian jumped, hands going for a sword that wasn't there. But no matter, he was trained to break a man's bones in less then five moves, he could handle…

 

A cow? 

 

Damian felt his face burn with embarrassment. He was off his game to be startled by a cow. He reached a handout and the cow pressed its snout into his palm, nuzzling it. 

 

How odd. 

 

Then again he had beaten a murderous clown with a crowbar so this could be considering the  _ least odd _ thing he has done. He always had a fondness for animals, he liked them more than humans if he was being honest with himself. 

 

A hand was placed on his shoulder and he turned, about to chaste the person who would dare touch him. An older gentleman smiled at him and gestured to the cow. "I see she has taken a liking to you?" 

 

"Perhaps. What's a cow doing at a festival?" 

 

The man smiled sadly and moved to pat the flank of the animal. "This one is young but I can't take care of her anymore. I was trying to see if I could have someone take her before she got sent to a slaughterhouse instead."

 

His fingers were already in his pocket, pulling out one of the black credit cards his father owned. 

 

Oh, did he say his father? He meant Drake. 

 

"How much?" 

 

The older gentleman looked shocked, "Pardon? My hearing must be better than normal, I thought you said-" 

 

Damian nearly let out an impatient huff but managed to hold it back, "How much for the cow? I'm willing to pay for it."

 

"Oh no, son. I don't need the money, just make sure you take care of her, okay?" The man spent a few moments untying the cow from the empty booth and handing the leash to Damian. 

 

"You have my word. 

 

+++

 

Dinah has seen Clark and Diana go at it in the battle against each other. She has seen so-called gods reign hell on earth. But nothing, no disaster would have prepared her for  _ this _ . She had ignored the chatter and noises at first, more content on carefully her next plant project via comment cards that were decorated quite lovingly. They looked as if they were recipe cards just for plants. 

 

Her name was called and when she turned, she busted out laughing. Damian looked amused and almost prince like on top of a cow. 

 

_ A cow.  _

 

For a brief moment, she wondered how Bruce would react. Dinah wiped tears of laughter out of her eyes, her grin never leaving her face. She should have known, anyone who is a Bat is willing to go above and beyond just to be extra. And Damian fit the bill. 

 

She was starting to adore the kid even more. 

 

"Dinah, I gotten a cow," he said plainly, his eyes narrowed as if he dared her to object. "Her name is Bat-cow and I think I would rather be vegetarian." 

 

"Nothing wrong with being vegetarian, little bird. Just make sure to include plant versions of protein," she said nonchalantly while patting the cow's head. Dinah could see Damian's curiosity in the things in her arms. 

 

"Just a few gardening supplies for me, is there anything you would like to see."

 

"At first I didn't see the sense in taking me here…I guess I'm starting to see the appeal."

 

A woman next to her whispered in her ear, "Your son is a wonder."

 

Dinah laughed and shook her head, "Oh, he's not my son, just a friend was out of town for today." The lie can easy through her teeth. They both continued onward, the crowd was growing larger but they made way for the odd child, his cow, and based on the whispers she was hearing. 

 

Allegedly, she was his baby sitter. 

 

The thought nearly sent her roaring with laughter. Damian is the  _ last  _ child on the planet that would be needing a baby sitter. If anything, he would be the babysitter. 

 

They stopped at a booth that catches Dinah's eye. 

 

Art supplies. 

 

God, she hadn't drawn in a while, maybe a new sketchbook would spark her creative juices again. A few hardcover sketchbooks with beautifully etched carvings peek her interests. And Damian's too, he was staring at a beautiful sketchbook that had golden edges and was made of leather, a golden lock that had lovely engravings sat in the middle. She pointed at the sketchbook as she gestured the shopkeeper. 

 

"How much for the sketchbook?" 

 

The shopkeeper was a black woman with grey hair that she fashioned in dreads. Golden hoop earring dangled from her ears. "Oh, that is free just you buy three more items, consider it a bargain." 

 

"Done."

 

Damian suddenly leapt down from his position on Bat-cow, "It's not necessary Dinah. I can pay for it."

 

"Nonsense, consider it a gift, little bird."

 

Damian bit his lip before nodding. Dinah had thought he would make more of a fuss and argue over it. They ended up getting three sketchbooks each, and a few other supplies between them. Dinah noticed Damian's mood visibly brightened once the sketchbook he was eyeing was placed in his hands. With little protest from the boy, she dragged him to a pizza place that was no far from the festive. Sure Bat-cow made a little of a fuss but the animal became content eating the grass outside. 

 

Dinah grabbed a slice before speaking, "So you draw?" 

 

Damian studied the pizza in front of him before gingerly grabbing a slice for himself. "Yes, Mother expected me to at a good eye in the arts." he took a bite before his eyebrows rose. 

 

"This is surprisingly good."

 

"I'm glad you like it, I'm sure Alfred wouldn't mind making some for you." She bit her lip and mulled over her words, pondering how she was going to say what she wanted to say. 

 

"You're wondering why I decided to come. You're wondering why I decided to join my father and his…worthless pursuit of justice."

 

Dinah shook her head, it wasn’t a surprise to her that he would start questioning her now, "No, I'm not wondering about any of that. We all have our own reasons for doing what we do." She placed a hand on Damian's delicately, unsure if the boy would pull away. "I'm not here to try to poke through your head or change you. I only want to a friendly face, and I hope...you will let me."

 

Damian shifted in his seat, uncomfortable focusing on Dinah’s hand on top of his own, "Why?"

 

"Why what?" 

 

"Why do you want to be friends with  _ me?” _

 

Why indeed?

 

Dinah always had her reasons for doing what she does, it was partly the reason she decided to become the therapist of all the heroes. They need an outlet for their inner emotions that they keep bottle up. To speak about the nightmares that plague each and every night. Heavens knows, she sometimes can’t go a night without screaming or crying into her pillows from her night terrors. But Damian doesn’t need a therapist unless he wants him. Dinah has observed and interacted with him many times, Damian is arrogant- with good reason to be. His skills were extraordinary for someone of his size and age. 

 

And he was lonely.

 

She doubts that Ra’s al Ghul let Damian interact with people his age group or even people that weren’t there just to serve him. Dinah had overheard Tim on multiple occasions complain about Damian’s antics, but she can see a child that lashes out. Bruce had never gone into details about Damian but she could tell that the kid was out of his element. Placed into an environment that had different rules than what he is used to. 

 

Dinah could relate. 

 

Growing up on the streets after her parents’ fatal deaths was a kill or be killed environment. Every day was a fight for survival- a survival of the fittest for lack of a better term. When she started training under Wildcat and others, she had lashed out due to her frustrations. She was angry at the world essentially for so many reasons. For taking her parents away, for the cruelty and discrimination, she deals with for being a child of a white man and black woman. She was angry at the world and even now there were still so many things she was angry about. Even still, this was about Damian, not her and her problems that she deals with in private.

 

She wanted Damian to have someone that wasn’t in the Batfamily, someone to talk to. Dinah knew full well that having an echo chamber wasn’t healthy for anyone, plus there was absolutely no reason for Damian not to creating relationships outside of his family.

 

So that is why. Dinah wanted to give Damian what she didn’t have, a stable friend for the good and bad times. 

 

Dinah choose to stare at her fizzing soda as she spoke, “I don’t know why, but I know this Damian,” Her blue eyes looked up at him and she squeezed his hand, 

 

“You are good.”  

 

+++

 

_ “You are good, Damian,” his caregiver whispered into his ears as her body slumped forward. She coughed once, twice before her head rested on his shoulder. Her body, once full of energy was like a lead weight on him.  _

 

“You are good,” Dinah told him, looking at him with understanding in her eyes. 

 

Why?

 

Why did she think that?

 

He wasn’t good.

 

He was anything but good. Damian wasn’t his grandfather with centuries of murder and blood on his hands but he was getting there. Some might say that his crimes were even worse than Ra’s. 

 

She didn’t know why she was trying to be his friend. 

 

Dinah was a fool. 

 

But he had to admit that it was nice, comforting even to have someone to talk to. It was nice to have someone who didn’t walk around on eggshells around him. He was capable of controlling himself and taking his frustrations out in his sketchbook and the dummies in the Bat cave were the only reason he hasn't snapped yet. 

 

If this works out, he could have someone to talk to. 

 

Maybe. 

 

Damian scoffed instead, choosing to focus on his slice of pizza, "Believe what you like Dinah."

 

"You don't believe you're a good person."

 

"Good and bad are merely subjective," he retorted, dodging her question all while swiping her drink and taking a sip. Merely out of curiosity. 

 

He regretted it. Damian's nose wrinkled as he pushed it away. 

 

"It tastes like  _ pure sugar _ . How can you even drink that?" He sounded appalled, almost offended. Dinah only laughed at his expression, "I happen to enjoy soda once in a while. If you think that's bad, you haven't tasted a real treat."

 

"And that is?" 

 

"Fried butter on a stick."

 

Damian made a face, "I believe you mean- the fastest way to die. Painfully."

 

To be honest, he wasn't wrong about that. Hal had dragged her and Diana to one of the fairs here at one point and forced them to try it. She'd never seen Diana launched something other than an enemy so far. 

 

_ "This…is a spawn of underworld horror." _

 

As they continued to eat, Damian felt himself relaxing in her presence. Dinah seemed to have that effect on people, judging by his father's interactions with her. The stoic man actually spoke like a decent human person around her. But that could just be due to the fact that there was video footage of Dinah kicking his father's ass and then some. 

 

The only other woman who was capable of that was his mother. 

 

"So little bird, what do we do with Bat-cow?" she said leaning back in her booth, jamming a finger at the animal, who looked more content with the grass on the ground that the people staring at it. An idea popped into his head and he smiled. 

 

"I may have an idea."

 

The screech of Drake was music to Damian's ears as he curled up on one of the sofas of the library. Grayson looked at him with curiosity before leaving briefly to check on Drake. 

 

Typical. 

 

Bat-cow will find plenty to eat in Drake's room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave me a comment and kudos


	3. I'm Never Enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this next chapter. A trigger warning for the shaming of coping mechanisms and nervous breakdown

Four months later and he is currently banned from another two weeks of going on patrol. 

 

Again. 

 

Damian grumbled in his room, more focused on the new sketchbook he gotten from Dinah. He chased out Grayson from his room earlier, the older man's lame attempt to make him feel better. Telling him that it was a slow night so he would have been bored anyways. 

 

That wasn't the point. 

 

He hated being confined to one place. It was one of the punishments he was given in the League. Locked inside a metal box for God's know how long. Damian pushed away those memories and focused on what he was drawing. Random doodles, not at all of what he normally did. Unfinished paintings littered the surroundings of his room of different scenes. Some of them he doesn’t even know what he was painting, but the way they were drawn, if someone that wasn’t Alfred looked at them closely...well…

 

He would probably get sent back to his mother.

 

Or worst.

 

Art was the only thing now that he couldn’t be bothered with, no one dared to try and take it away from him. Thought his siblings would stand behind him when he drew in his sketchbook outside of his room. Just like Mother…

 

Her steel gaze focused on every line, paint stroke and any mistake he made. Nothing pleased her high expectations, she’d nod and simply point out every mistake, he has made before leaving, letting him stew in his self-pity. And he would await his punishment for failure. 

 

Damian visibly flinched from the brief trip down memory lane. No, Mother wanted him to get better, to be the best. No matter the cost, and fight until the very end, until one was hacked to pieces. She hung one of his paintings in her chambers. He’s sure of it. Damian looked at the time and cursed. He’s off schedule, he was due to feed Titus, Batcow and Alfred fifteen minutes ago. The boy nearly flew out of his room and nearly slammed into someone. 

 

“If you’re trying to beat the Flash’s time, good luck.”

 

Todd.

 

Damian sneered and said nothing as he pushed another boy away. “Piss off Todd.” He continued his descent downstairs unaware of Todd picking up a piece of paper and frowning at it.

 

_ “Oh, Bruce isn’t going to like this. At all…” _

 

Alfred brushed against his leg as he poured dry cat food into his bowl. Apparently, there was no need for him to worry about anything. Batcow still had enough hay to last him until next week and Titus had been sleeping anyways. Damian smiled briefly, residing in the peace and quiet of the yard. No family numbers calling his name or blaming him for their obvious misdeeds. Damian blinked then frowned. Should he refer to them as a family? No one treated him like a family member, not that he knew what that was like. Grayson was the only one in the household who didn’t treat him like a glass doll. As if any moment he was going to go on a rampage. 

 

But even still, Grayson attempted to push him too far for his liking and he just wasn't ready. Thankfully, he wasn't like his Father. He didn’t need fixing or needed to change. He was fine the way he was. Why did everyone want to make him into something he isn’t?

 

Why?

 

He was fine that way he was.   
  
Damian didn’t want to conform to someone’s ideas of what he should be  _ again _ . To be forged into a new weapon.

 

He was fine.

 

Just everyone needed to lay off and treat him like an actual human being.

 

_ Dinah did. _

 

She didn’t try to fix him or mould him into what she believed was right for him. She let him choose.

 

“Damian!”

 

Wonderful.

 

What now? More judgements coming his way? Still, he rose from his spot in the grass and entered the mansion once more. His Father’s voice appeared to be coming from the kitchen. His stomach coiled into knots as he stepped closer, every step seemed to go towards his doom. Though that last statement was stupid, he had done nothing wrong. He was a  _ good little boy _ tonight did assignment given to him by Pennyworth and kept out of the way.

 

What did he do this time?

 

His father was still in his gear, hands pressed down against the granite table. Everyone else was in their gear as well, making conversation which immediately stopped the moment he stepped into the room. 

 

“The party immediately dies the moment Demon Brat walks in,” Brown jokes with a grin on her face. A mere side glare from his father has her silent within an instant, in fact...everyone became silent. Damian crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow, “Did you have a good partol Father?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Todd snorted from the corner, clearly having no issues on speaking despite his Father’s clear mood. “You should have been there, you would have gotten a laugh at Tim almost getting hit by a pole.” The ends of his mouth curled into a small smile as he bit his lower lip. 

 

Serves him right.

 

“That is not important, Jason. Damian...explain,” A paper held up in his hand and Damian froze. His stomach twisted on itself as his eyes widen.

 

He was damn sure that page was in his sketchbook.

 

In his room.

 

For all their nosiness, at least the people he lived knew never to look through his sketchbooks. Then again he did threaten Grayson with acid in his eyeballs so that helped quite long. 

 

No one wanted to test that threat.

 

Regardless, no matter how one looked at it, the drawing appeared very graphic. Two-Face sliced in half with a meat cleaver. Blood and gore spilt from the wound in a mess of pencil markings. It was created...during one of his bad days. Bloodlust that even punching the training dummies in the Cave couldn’t solve. It didn’t help that he was benched during that time again, therefore he had no outlet other than his sketchbook. During these episodes, as he called them, he itched to deliver true justice to criminals who truly deserved it. He instead, actively choose to vent out his frustrations through hours of scribbles of ballpoint pens, graphite, and charcoal, until he could control himself again. 

 

Thinking about it now, it made him seem like a caged rabid animal. Seconds before gnawing on the metal that kept him trapped and going on a rampage. 

 

But that didn’t mean he was going to act upon those sketches. He had plans to burn them anyway, once all traces of murder was drained from his blood. 

 

As if they would drain from his blood.

 

His blood practically thrived on the blood he spilt in the past.

 

He chose to stay silent, nails digging into his arms. His father’s face was that of stone, blue eyes cold as ice as he tried not to look at them, choosing to look at the floor. Like he should be ashamed for doing this. Isn’t that what his Father wanted from him? To be perfect? Free of the bloodlust that still clung to him?

 

Or it didn’t matter.

 

“Damian, what is this?”

 

“What do you think? A drawing,” he retorted, cursing at himself for behaving like a child. He was an Al Ghul, they don’t give in to fear. 

 

He wasn’t a coward.

 

“Don’t play innocent,  _ boy _ ,” his father snapped at him, ignoring how Damian flinched visibly at the word, almost curling in on himself. 

 

_ “Don’t play stupid, boy, Deal with your punishment as an Al Ghul, not a whimpering child.”  _

 

_ “Yes...Grandfather,” Damian said in a small voice, head looking down at the ground.  _

 

_ He failed again. _

 

Grayson reached out at that moment to touch his father’s shoulder, “Bruce, I don’t think there is a reason to be this harsh about it. It’s only a drawing that Jason found in the hallway. It doesn’t add to the fact that Damian has been doing well so far.”

 

“Entrance of Damian’s open-door actually.”

 

“Sure, as it matters.”

 

The drawing crumbled in Bruce’s fingers, “It’s a drawing now, but what if it happens on the field?”

 

Grayson pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly annoyed by the statement, “Be reasonable Bruce. When will that actually happen? Have you thought about  _ why _ Damian is drawing this.”

 

_ Don’t talk like I’m not even there. _

 

Drake shrugged his shoulders, appearing almost smug in this situation, “It’s possible, it’s only a matter of time to be completely honest.”

 

_ I threw away all of my training years prior, only to be treated like dirt. You constantly insult me, and expect me not to fight back? _

 

“Tim….do you even  _ hear yourself _ ?”

 

_ Stop it. _

 

_ Stop talking about me. _

 

_ I’m right here. _

 

_ I’m fine. _

 

He was fine.

 

He wasn’t a ticking time bomb.

 

Damian’s body trembled as the voices roared in his ears. Nothing he did was okay to them. They would always find a way to pick at whatever he did. Everything he did was  _ wrong _ .

 

The realization hit him as if he was running steadfastly into a brick wall. He almost let out a loud sob of disbelief, but he should have expected this anyways.

 

He had no love here.

 

_ “I have no love here,” _ Damian echoed the words back to himself quietly, taking small steps backwards before turning on his heel and bolting out of the kitchen. Ignoring the calls for him to return. Why should he return anyways? They didn’t want him there. His feet carried him to his room, slamming the door and locking it for good measure.

 

He had no love here. A small sob of anguish spilt from his lips. What could he do? Where could he go? Running back to his mother with his tail between his legs will not bold well for him in the long run. He was here to get to know his father, to know the other side of his inheritance. To learn from him.

 

All he learned was that he was unwanted.

 

Unloved.

 

It shouldn’t have mattered if he was happy or not, it wasn’t supposed to matter. And yet it mattered so much. 

 

It mattered so much to him. He wasn’t happy here or even felt like he belonged. He tried to follow rules, every rule and the one thing he enjoys more than everything was being threatened away from him. As if a drawing would cause him to act out in reality. He was back to square one, though he doubted he even left it anyways. 

 

After a year and a half, nothing. He was still viewed as ready to snap, ready to drown Gotham in the blood of criminals. Ready to watch the city choke on her own blood.

 

He has no love here.

 

Whispers and shadows of footsteps shuffled underneath his door. Damian’s fingers gripped the sketchbook, he was gifted to by Dinah. He needed to leave to get out until the tension left-

 

No.

 

He needed to leave for good.

 

Damian had no love here.

 

It wasn’t hard to pack a few things, just clothes, his sketchbooks as well as the loose-leaf sketch paper he drew on. A knock on the door startled him but he didn’t answer. There wasn’t a need to answer. 

 

He had no love here.

 

+++

 

Dinah relaxed against the soft cushions of her couch, curling up with a cup of hot tea as the television blared the news. Same old, same old. Politicians making promises they couldn’t keep, meaningless information about billionaire Bruce Wayne latest sexual adventures. She laughed at that one, knowing full well the Dark Knight’s affections to a certain Green Lantern.

 

Well, mutual affections. 

 

Still, she couldn’t focus, something was happening. Something bad. Her gut was never wrong before. Her thoughts trailed away and she was almost dozing off when she heard a loud thump coming from upstairs.

 

She groaned and drew a small pocket knife from the inside of her robe. So much for a peaceful night. It wasn’t Ollie, they were currently in the middle of a fight. And it certainly wasn’t Roy, he was in Europe, a sudden mission had taken him there.

 

Who else…

 

Oh, she knows. Her bare feet padded quietly on the soft carpet as she reached the bottom of the stairs. 

 

“Damian?”

 

She didn’t receive a verbal answer but she heard him moving about upstairs. Dinah has no issues with the superheroes community entering her home but can they at least call?

 

Diana sends a raven so at least she gets it.

 

She really needs a phone though.

 

Still, she made her way up the stairs, all while messing with the mess she called her hair. Yeah, maybe it was best for her to leave it alone for now. She had someone who needed her more. All the doors in the hallway were open except one. 

 

Her room.

 

She wasn’t paranoid like Bruce but she valued being aware of his surroundings. Closed doors in her line of work, typically meant that something has been hidden or she was seconds away from being shot or kicked. Dinah lightly knocked on the door, sniffle spilt her worry. 

 

“Damian, I’m coming inside.” She slowly turned the knob of the door before entering. She shivered from the window, her dark curtains flowing in the breeze. A large duffel bag was propped up against the wall. Damian was sitting on the side of her bed, eyes red and puffy like he had been crying for a while.

 

Dinah felt a lump in her throat. What she knows of Damian, he will never show weakness to someone. Something probably ingrained in him. 

 

_ And he’s letting her see him like this. _

 

_ He trusts her. _

 

Dinah immediately sat down next to him, her hand on his own. “You can stay as long as you live. Have you eaten yet?”

 

“...No.”

 

“Well, how about I introduce you to an American tradition? Breakfast for dinner.” She stood, offering her hand towards him. He looked at it for a long moment, before taking it and following her downstairs. Her worry only grew, as Damian just sat at the table, looking blankly at the table. After making pancakes and setting the plate in front of him, Dinah poured her a glass of wine.

 

She would probably need a glass just for this conversation, or lack thereof. They sat in uncomfortable silence, Damian mindlessly poking at his food.

 

Fuck it.

 

There wasn’t a single doubt in her mind that Bruce was behind this. Either that or Damian out of his own will decided to visit her at two in the morning. How did he even find her house?

 

Nevermind, he’s Batman’s son. 

 

Question answered.

 

“Little bird?”

 

He looked up at her after a few moments, “Yes?” She reached out to his hand, “I’m not going to pry, you can tell me whatever happened later. As for now, eat.”

 

“You’re...not going to question me?”

 

“Something happened, I’m not going to be naive to that, pressing you to talk about it now will only cause a breakdown, or a second one if you haven’t had one already,” she took another sip of wine before speaking again. “At the moment little bird, you need food and sleep.” 

 

And maybe eleven years worth of therapy.

 

_ I will make those who’ve hurt you pay. _

 

She wasn’t shocked by the thought, her affections for Damian have been growing more and more since the day they met. He enjoyed being in her presence and she enjoyed his. It was like a breath of fresh air compared to what she does daily. 

 

Plus, she had the week off from superhero business, only jumping in if there was an emergency that required all of the League. 

 

Damian gave her a grim smile in return and slowly ate his pancakes, Dinah sipping wine and humming quietly to herself. She squeezed Damian’s shoulder as he headed up to her room. There was a brief discussion about where he should sleep but after Dinah’s excuse of having more work to do, he eventually relented him. 

 

She collapsed on the couch, feeling mentally drained already. Dinah had her suspicions before but now with Damian in her home, it pretty much outright confirms it. In Wayne Manor, Damian isn’t mentally comfortable there. It’s an odd thing to think about but if someone, mostly a child feels the need to physically leave their home to feel comfortable, then there was something seriously wrong. Now, she wasn’t the one to pry into Bruce’s private life, until he is with almost everyone else. She has sat down with Dick and Tim during therapy sessions before, occasionally Jason will show up but that’s pretty much it. 

 

Dinah stretched before grabbing her phone, shooting off a quick text before heading up the stairs. 

 

So much for a peaceful evening.

  
  


+++

 

Dick wasn’t sure if he was doing the right thing, sitting on his motorcycle just two miles away from Gotham’s entrance. He could see the city’s skyline underneath the blanket of smog and fog it laid in. In its morid way, one could say that it was almost peaceful. 

 

Peaceful, however, what not how he would describe his family at the moment. More like a dysfunction mess. He ran his hand through his thick hair, glancing down at the bright screen of his phone. He’d received a text from Dinah just moments after his conversation with Bruce.

 

Well, more like a conversation with a brick wall. Bruce had been unrelenting about how he viewed what Damian was doing and didn’t take it lightly when Dick had suggested that maybe banning Damian from venting through drawing wasn’t the right thing to do. Bruce had argued that who knows what would happen if he lets it continue.

 

And once Bruce has his mindset, there isn't anyone on the planet that would be able to change his mind. It's something that Dick equal admires and annoys about his mentor. His way of doing things isn't helping Damian. The way Dick saw it, it was a type of coping mechanism for his little brother. And it was either that or Damian kills someone.

 

As for Tim, well...Dick was disappointed. Contrary to popular belief, he wasn't blind to the fact that Damian tried to kill him. Hell, the kid had tried to kill everyone at some point.

 

And honestly, it wasn't hard to figure out why Damian had it out for Tim in the first place. Either the other knew about it and decided to use it against him or he was completely unaware.

 

_ That would be the first time _ .

 

Damian was jealous. Tim didn't come into Bruce's life through tragic events like himself or Jason. Tim still had his parents when he became Robin, he only did it because he knew Bruce needed a Robin after Jason's death.

 

_ And needed a distraction after I almost killed the Joker. _

 

And Dick would deny it out loud but he did enjoy it.

 

And let's face it, the only reason why Damiam was Robin in the first place was so Bruce could keep an eye on him. Which started as a good idea until Bruce constantly benched him. 

 

And now this…

 

He buried his face in his hands. He just wanted Damian to feel safe. He didn't doubt in his mind that Damian doesn't consider them family.

 

But Dick did.

 

He considered Damian his little brother. And he wanted to do everything in his power to make sure he was okay.

 

"Okay, so brooding isn't just a Batman thing then."

 

Dick didn't smile as he turned to face Dinah, "How is he?"

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"Damian. You're the only one who he would actively seek out. Dinah, please tell me he's okay."

 

He watched her sigh heavily before walking up next to him, leaning on the railing. "He's shaken but otherwise physically fine." She looked him in the eyes, an unreadable expression in them.

 

"Whatever happened…"

 

"Bruce found...unsavoury drawings created by Damian in the form of villains being slaughtered." Her blank expression made him paused before she snorted.

 

"Bruce of all people should know the importance of coping mechanisms. The man dressed like a fucking Bat to deal with his grief,” her grip on the metal bar tightened as she hunched over as if she wanted to fling herself off the ledge from this conversation. “What else?”

 

“What else?”

 

She turned to look at him hard, “What else has Bruce done for the “greater good” of Damian.”

 

Dick swallowed, “He wanted to ban him from drawing his feelings down.”

 

Dinah said nothing for a long moment, and Dick took a couple of steps back and covered his ears. He knew that look and he was lucky that Bruce wasn’t here. His eardrums were still hurting after her sonic scream. Thankfully, they weren’t bleeding this time, though Green Arrow deserved that sonic scream he got. In addition to the full smackdown, Dinah brought down on him. 

 

He had a feeling that Bruce will experience the same at some point when he least expects it. And Bruce expects almost everything. Dinah decided to simply brood, pacing around in a circle, occasionally looking back at Gotham, as if she wanted to drive to the Wayne Manor and personally kick Bruce’s ass. Dick wouldn’t neccassilary help her kick his ass but he’d gladly let her inside. 

 

Maybe it wouldn’t be a good time to throw Tim under the bus.

 

Yet.

 

Dinah turned to him, blue eyes blazing with something he had never seen in her before. “Any of his stuff that you think he would need, bring them over to my house. You know the address.” She said nothing else before getting on her motorcycle and riding away, clearly not interested in speaking anymore. Dick didn’t blame her, he merely sighed and leaned against the railing. It wasn’t fair for Damian. Then again Bruce was out of his element when dealing with Damian but it was a little too simple. 

 

Don’t force Damian to change, break it down little by little. Get Damian to trust you and let him in. Dick rubbed his forehead and continued to look out to the city. 

 

He will try, he will try to get Damian to trust him.

 

Until then, his hopes lie in Dinah’s hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a Comment and Kudos
> 
> Also please keep in mind that this story is being written in mostly Damian point of view.


	4. A Resolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, it was official.
> 
> She would not let anything happen to this kid. Dinah would protect him with every fighting breath in her.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> Here is the next chapter of this fic! I will admit that this is the hardest one to write so far so thank you for being so patient in waiting for it!
> 
> Enjoy!

She woken to two green eyes staring back at her on the couch. 

 

Dinah groaned, rubbing her face with both of her hands, as she sat up. She stretched, sighing in relief as her bones cracked. Sleeping on the couch was a bad idea, period. But the guest room in her two-bedroom house was currently being used as a makeshift music recording studio. The equipment she used was scattered all over the floor as well as the bed. Dinah didn’t have time to sort through everything with the superheroing that she does. 

 

This was reserved for a rainy Sunday afternoon.

 

Dinah didn’t get much sleep the rest of the night when she closed the door to where Damian slept. She ended up pacing around her living room before she finally dozed off in a light slumber around six in the morning. Or maybe, it was around four in the morning. 

 

Didn’t matter, all she knew was that the sun was rising when she finally collapsed on her couch. Her pacing was to calm her mind and prevent her from doing something drastic in the middle of the night. Like going after Bruce and demanding to know what he was thinking. 

 

Dinah was so tempted, and it would have been so easy too. But she had Damian to think about, while she wouldn’t get the majority of the scorn if Damian was around…

 

No, he wasn’t going back to Bruce. She isn’t going to send him back. At the most, Bruce was probably very much aware that Damian had fled his home but was clueless as to where he would go. This was new territory for her and she was unsure how to navigate it, but she would do it for Damian. Everyone coped in one way or another, bad or good. Damian’s was a good coping mechanism, drawing how he feels instead of harming himself or others. Even if it looks odd to someone else, it works for him. 

 

And that’s all that matters.

 

“So when are you going to send me back to my father?” Damian said, his voice was unusually soft. Dinah blinked once, before whipping around to face Damian. She was awake now, fully awake. 

 

“I’m not going to send you back to him, Damian.” She took a closer look at the boy, Damian looked ready to flee, like a deer in headlights. His body language was reading tense like he was mentally preparing himself for her to reject him. Dinah reached out and pulled Damian into her arms, hugging him.

 

“Little bird, why would I send you back? I’m not going to.”

 

_ Even if I have to take you far away from Gotham City. I’m not letting you go back there.  _

 

Damian trembled in her arms, his hands gripping the robe she wore, “I...I was feeding Titus and Alfred the cat when I was called. Todd found one of my drawings...I was going to burn them eventually. I didn’t want them to see...because I knew they wouldn’t understand. Father and..Drake...they accused me..” He hiccuped, letting out a quiet sob. 

 

“I was good! I kept being good no matter how much shit was thrown in my face. I tried to stay in my Father’s code...I was  _ useful. I was useful to them and I was good! _  I was how they wanted me to be!” His eyes were watery when he looked up at her, anger and shame swirled in his eyes like whirlwinds. He wasn’t upset at her, Dinah knew this. She nodded her head, beckoning him to continue. He needed to let it all out. 

 

Damian let out a watery laugh, “I tried to be good...but I wasn’t good enough for  _ them _ .” 

 

“I’m not surprised, he was tossed a dull weapon at his feet. He doesn’t know what to do with me, he still doesn’t.” His bottom lip trembled and he let out a sob, then another and another until he was fully sobbing in her arms. Tears soaked through her silk robe but she didn’t care. It was a small thing compared to witnessing Damian finally breaking down. Dinah swallowed down her bubbling anger, holding Damian close to her body, pressing a soft kiss on his temple. 

 

“Damian-”

 

He cut her off, looking up at her with tears still streaming down his face, frowning, attempting to wipe them away. “I’m a weapon...weapons don’t  _ weep.” _

 

It sounded like a mantra, something that he had been told multiple times throughout his life. One that he wanted to believe but just couldn’t. Dinah doubted he believed what he was saying anyway.

 

He was not a monster.

 

Nor is he a weapon.

 

He is a child. 

 

Damian is a  _ child. _

 

She smiled softly at him, wiping a stray tear away from his cheek, “You don’t believe this, you don’t believe you are an emotionless weapon.” She cupped his face in her hands before she continued to speak.

 

“You feel. It’s okay  _ to feel _ . You’re not weak for feeling, for having remorse.”

 

“But I didn’t!”

 

Dinah hummed, “But do you feel remorse?”

 

“What?”

 

“Do you feel remorse? Over what you have done?”

 

“I...I...yes?”

 

She pulled him into another hug, “Let me tell you a secret. If you feel remorse over what you did, you’re on the right path. Everyone in this world is trying, and  _ everyone  _ is deserving of a second chance. You’re okay to try, Damian.”

 

Trying is all anyone can do in this unforgiving world.

 

She felt his hands wrap around her, his fingers curling into her robe as his head pressed against her neck. He was trembling again, another wave of tears, soaked through her clothes but she once again didn’t bother to care. Dinah hummed softly, rocking Damian in her arms, bringing him closer to her as if she was his mother. The thought of Damian’s mother sent a wave of bitterness and anger through her system. 

 

His mother did something to this boy, moulded him into a weapon- or what she thought was a weapon. Maybe she knew he would be emotional or maybe she didn’t give a damn.

 

Dinah pushed that thought to the side, filing it for later, all her focus was the boy in her arms. She continued to hum quietly, a lullaby forming from her lips. One of the few things that her mother had left her with, she could no longer remember the lyrics but the melody would forever be burned into her brain. 

 

She almost didn’t hear Damian speak to her over her humming, 

 

_ “Thank you...Dinah” _

 

+++

 

Dinah was somewhat used to dealing with Bruce and his family drama. One can’t be a member of the Justice League without having to deal with some form of his drama. It started with Dick being fired as Robin and taking up his mantle, which she didn’t see Dick around Bruce until he became Nightwing with the Teen Titans in toll. She said nothing when the Red Hood was brought up in meetings, Bruce saying that he has it until control and no one should harm him. 

 

It slowly became an unspoken rule that no-one should attempt to interfere with how to manage his Robins. 

 

That changes, now.

 

Dinah felt guilty, she should have said something or done something, consequences are damned. She wasn’t afraid of him and  _ he  _ knew it. Everyone knew it. Dinah wasn’t the most known superhero nor part of the main Trinity. But she was still dangerous, and she could make people’s lives a living hell if she chooses too.

 

Bruce was not an exception to that rule. 

 

She convinced Damian to eat something for breakfast hours before, now they were both sitting in a diner in Bludhaven, waiting for Dick Grayson to arrive. Damian squirmed in the plush red booth beside her, pretending that he wasn’t looking anxiously at his watch. Dinah scrolled through her notifications on her phone wordlessly, her free hand touching Damian’s. She got a few text messages from Ollie and sent a clipped response. Oliver Queen needed to realise that not everything was about him, and she lived her own life. 

 

Dinah sighed in frustration before nearly slamming her phone down the wooden table. She stopped herself just time with the sharp mental reminder that this is the third phone she had broke this month. She nearly jumped for joy at the sight of Dick at the entrance, rushing towards them. 

 

Oh right, she forgot that he has a day job as a cop, the irony of it made her smile a little brighter. In the corner of her eye, Damian visibly brightens up, and she chuckled to herself. She filed that information for later, confirming her suspicions that Damian does hold some form of fondness for Dick. The other man smiled sheepishly as he slid into the booth.

 

“Sorry, traffic was hell.”

 

“Believe me, I am aware.” She nearly used her Canary Cry out of anger trying to get into Bludhaven with Damian, spending about thirty minutes in traffic. 

 

_ Dinah huffed and blew a strand of blond hair out of her face. She looked over at Damian with a smile,  _

 

_ “We are going to take the zeta tubes next time.” _

 

“How have you been Dami?”

 

Dinah watched as Damian’s eyes widened, his face in shock before it went as fast as it came. Interesting. “I’m fine...I’m sure that Father knows I’m gone. He must be thrilled.”

 

Dick’s expression turned grim, “Actually, he thinks that you are just hiding away...and will come back later. I tried talking to him but you know how Bruce is when he makes up his mind.” He has a faraway look on his face, mumbling a few words before speaking out loud again, 

 

Dinah couldn’t catch what was said but she was positive that they were quite unflattering. 

 

“For all its’ worth, Jason is sorry that he caused this.”

 

Damian huffed, “It’s mostly his fault...and also mine. I shouldn’t have drawn them…” 

 

Dick shook his head, “No, Damian, you have every right to draw them. You didn’t act upon them did you?”

 

“Of course not.”

 

“You didn’t. It's that simple.”

 

Dinah cut it, “Anyhow, eventually Bruce is going to realise that Damian is not going to return to the Manor. And I don’t know what to do about it” She leaned forward, “I know that Bruce is Damian’s father but...I’m not risking Damian’s mental health. I’m not.” Dick said nothing, slumming down in his seat. 

 

“...I think...getting him out of Gotham is the best thing.”

 

Dinah looked at Damian, “Little bird? Thoughts…?”

 

Damian looked down into his lap, “I don’t know. I was sent by my mother to live with my father. After that...I don’t know.” He looked up, his eyes somewhat watery, his gaze directed at Dick, 

 

“I...I..” Damian closed his mouth before swallowing, “I have no love there. I was merely given the Robin mantle to be watched, and I wasn’t good enough.” He reached into his pocket, the Robin symbol clutched tightly within his hands. Dinah’s eyes widened, she didn’t…

 

What?

 

“Damian?”

 

“I don’t deserve this. You can give it to Drake, he would be happy to hear that I have given up.” Damian slid the medallion across the table, Dick staring blankly at him, then at it. His fingers reached out to touch his beloved mantle before looking at Damian.

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I’m positive. I’m not stupid, the only reason why Father made me a Robin was to keep me in check. And I know how much Drake loves the mantle, he can completely have it back. He would be happy to know that he will not have to share it anymore.”

 

Dinah raised her hands in a form of surrender, “I do not know he was going to do this. Damian...are you sure?”

 

“Completely.”

 

Dick’s fingers flexed before he eventually pocketed the symbol away, “Alright. I respect your decision, Damian.” He gave the younger boy a small smile before he turned his attention to Dinah, 

 

“Eventually, Bruce is going to find out that Damian is not simply hiding away. He knows that you are close.”

 

“How long do we have?”

 

Dick crossed his arms and looked out the window, “I would give it two days from now, three days to be generous.” He leaned over the table, his expression turning serious, “I care about Damian’s wellbeing if getting him out of Gotham will help him.   _ Get him out of Gotham.”  _ Dinah nodded, glad that Dick was on the same page about leaving Gotham. 

 

“Seattle is nice this time of year,” she said as she turned towards Damian. “What do you want to do?” 

 

“I have...never been able to explore the rest of this country before...it would be nice to see the rest of it...”

 

Dick’s smile brightens, “Great! You guys can do a road trip!”

 

“We are not going to do classic road trip tunes, Dick.”

 

They ended up going into a record shop afterwards. 

 

Dinah couldn’t find it in her heart to be mad, looking over a couple of records to spot Damian flipping through classical music ones. Her heart fluttered in her chest and she let out a breath…

 

She will be okay.

 

Damian will be okay. He was a strong kid, he just needed someone to let him be himself. She walked over and plucked one of the records from the pile next to him. 

 

“Bach?”

 

He looked appalled and sneered, “Please...no one likes Bach.”

 

Dinah laughed, “Indeed, little bird. Fuck Bach.”

 

+++

 

Dick closed the door to his room with a heavy sigh, his fingers gripping the Robin insignia so tightly he was certain that he would be cut if he held it any tighter. He felt exhausted…

 

So exhausted. 

 

He left the diner with a hug from Dinah and a promise to Damian that he will not speak a word. He wasn’t going to anyway, not when the wounds of last night were too fresh from everyone involved. Dick rubbed his face with his free hand, looking at himself in the mirror. He blinked for a moment, seeing golden amber eyes staring back at him before fading back to his baby blue eyes. He flopped onto his bed, his hand still holding onto the insignia. Despite how he portrays himself, Dick was very observant. In his field of work both in the suit and out of it he had to be. It would be a life or death situation otherwise. 

 

He could see that eventually, Damian would give up the Robin mantle.

 

But he didn’t expect him to give it up so easily. Dick had to wonder about how much hurt Damian felt to the point of breaking? How long did Damian feel like he didn’t belong? And how much did Dick contribute to that hurt? 

 

The questions ran through his mind when his door opened, he quickly shoved the insignia under his pillow and sat up. 

 

“Oh, hey Tim. What do you need?”

 

“Where were you?”

 

Dick shook his head with a low chuckle, “I do have a 9 to 5 job that requires me to be there.” He patted the seat next to him, “So really, what is up?”

 

Tim shuffled his feet, “I...I didn’t expect...I didn’t expect him to leave.”

 

“I think we all didn’t expect him to run off. Did you think he was going to sit there and take it?” Dick bite back, ignoring how Tim flinched at the last statement. He willed himself to not get angry, before speaking again, 

 

“How I feel about how Bruce handled the situation, that's another story. I’m just...disappointed in you Tim-”

 

“Damian is dangerous and who knows if he acts out-”

 

Dick’s eyes flashed amber gold and Tim took a full step back, “What about  _ me?  _ What about all the blood that was on my hands. I know that Damian is not innocent, but he deserves to be able to be treated as normal.  _ Ticking time bomb.” _

 

“Dick that wasn’t you, you were being controlled,” Tim said warily, stepping forward. He reached out and rested a hand on Dick’s shoulder, “I know how you feel about Damian, but...he wasn’t being controlled or forced to do anything.” Dick raised an eyebrow, 

 

“What’s the difference between us? What is the difference between me and him? What is the difference between him and Jason?” Tim looked back and Dick stood up, just before grabbing the insignia from under his pillow. He handed it back to Tim,

 

“Damian wanted you to have this and no, I will not be telling you where he is. He is safe though.” Dick turned to leave his room. 

 

“I’m going to see if Alfred needs help...just think about it.” Dick left Tim standing there in his room, passing by Bruce.

 

“I know you were listening.  _ I’m not speaking a damn word. _ ”

 

+++

 

“Yes, Ollie I’m heading to Seattle for a while...I don’t know maybe a month or two? No, I don’t need a plane to come and get us, I will be fine driving, I swear.” Dinah mumbled into her phone, throwing articles of clothing into a suitcase. Still, Oliver insisted on giving her one of his penthouses to stay in for the duration of their trip. He didn’t question her about bringing Damian along, given she shut down that particular topic immediately. She was on a time-crunch, and she would rather be out of Gotham by the next sunrise than to wait about a week for Bruce to realise that Damian was out of Gotham grounds.

 

Dinah brushed blond strands of hair out of her face, “Yeah, I’ll call you once I get out of Gotham okay? Yeah, love you too, bye.” She hung up and looked around her room, her eyes falling onto her guitar. Her hand itched to grab it, to just strum something on it. She clenched her fist before turning away,

 

She gave up that life...she will not indulge that urge…

 

Dinah immediately grabbed the guitar and shoved it into her suitcase and closed it before she completely changed her mind. 

 

_ “Hypocrite.”  _ She hissed to herself. Dinah walked out of her room and headed down the chairs, her car was filled with gas and that should last them a good long while. Just enough to get them out of Gotham…

 

“Hey, Damian-”

 

Oh.

 

_ Oh. _

 

He was asleep. Curled up on himself on the couch, his bags already packed to go. He shifted in his sleep, his open sketchbook falling to the floor with a quiet thump. Carefully, she moved around to pick up the sketchbook. Curiosity got the better of her and she took a peek, her eyes widening.

 

It was her…

 

Two open sketchbook pages of her in various expressions and a medium-sized sketch of her at the diner. He managed to commit that to memory…

 

A soft smile dawned on her lips and she closed the book, slowly removing the graphic pencil from his hand to pack it into his bags. Dinah moved quickly and quietly, placing all the bags in the trunk of her car, checking and doubling checking for trackers or anything of the sort before heading back up the stairs and changing clothes. When she came down again, Damian was still asleep…

 

Dinah bit her lip, unsure if she should wake him up or just carry him to the car. She approached slowly, gently shaking him awake. His green eyes fluttered open and she smiled. 

 

Though she had no idea how to act when he lifted his arms, clearly asking to be picked up. Dinah blinked twice but indulged him, picking him up and carrying him outside. This..this was nice. 

 

She opened the passenger seat to set him inside and quickly made her way to the driver’s seat. Dinah looked over to him and he was asleep again. 

 

Yeah, it was official.

 

She would not let anything happen to this kid. Dinah would protect him with every fighting breath in her.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if you have noticed but if you look on how Damian sleeps from the first comic of Gleason and Tomasi's run of Batman and Robin and towards the end, there is a shift.
> 
> I just HAD to use it for this fic

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a Comment and Kudos!
> 
> Again, if you have any questions or headcanons you want to share, leave them in the comments or hit me up on Tumblr and Twitter(s). Any development on the designs for Damian will be on my art Twitter as well.
> 
> Tumblr: viruscreates  
> Fandom Twitter: Birdflash_Virus  
> Art Twitter: viruscreations


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